n00b(s) trolling hits

In which I do pretty much whatever I want.

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You know what I could really go for today?

A ukulele.

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ytoob:

i was outside eating a cookie and a saw about 5 ants just roaming around on top of the steps and i noticed there was only one ant that wasn’t holding anything like the other 4 where holding dorito bits or something and the  ant seemed sad it wasn’t even going in the same pace as the other ants so i put a cookie crumb next to him and he picked it up and started running as fast as the other ants and i think i made that little ants day 

(via pizza)

Source: mnagos

"Whenever you’re going through a bad day just remember, your track record for getting through bad days, so far, is 100%; and that’s pretty damn good."

- My amazing friend (via pain-is-temporary-keep-fighting)

(via shinydanger)

Source:

klartie:

dad NO

OH MY GOD.

(via mygirlfriendisnotgay)

Source: klartie

  • School: We don't allow bullying if you bully we will fuck you up
  • Student: I got bullied.
  • School: The fuck do you want us to do about it?

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tonyabbot:

scary-monsters-and-davesprite:

lonelyinsomniac:

samsaranmusing:

image

Orbital path of asteroid near miss in 2002. Yah, that’s how close we came to nuclear winter and possible total destruction.

A visitor.

It’s like it’s trying so hard to hit us and it just can’t do it

(via mygirlfriendisnotgay)

distortional-scum:

chellzisyeezus:

huffingtonpost:

THESE 16 DOGS ARE HEROES. THEY ARE ALSO PIT BULLS.

Virtually every dog relishes a loving scratch behind the ears and some sweet, vocal praise. But dogs identified as pit bulls get a bad reputation and a lot less love.

Try not to cry as you read the full stories behind these heroic pit bulls here. 

alkebu-lani

My baby Daisyduke saved my aunt, cousin, and I from a convicted rapist. Animals can do amazing things. Don’t doubt them.

(via thetinkertoyboy)

Source: huffingtonpost

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nayx:

party-pinkie-pie-style:

nayx:

hey did it hurt when ur refrigerator fell from heaven????  well you better go catch it!!!!!!!!!!!!

Are you on drugs?

i’m on cipralex for depression

(via that-kid-in-the-drifloon-hat)

Source: nayx

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Okay, but how did pizza delivery guys get anywhere before GPS????

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consp1racy:

2013: who’s Tatiana Maslany
2014: who ISN’T Tatiana Maslany

But actually.

(via cloneclubdancepartay)

Source: maslanystan

"'Cause you know I'd walk 1,609.344 kilometers if I could just see you tonight."

- Vanessa Carlton in Canada, probably

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I’m at a karaoke night, and I’m not old enough to be drunk enough to make it through the night.

  • Question: I like you. You are funny and yourself! Keep it that way :) - Anonymous
  • Answer:

    Aw, thank and bless. I needed this today. :)

  • Question: I thought your URL was I shit it like up's. Like the diapers brand - Anonymous
  • Answer:

    That’s exactly what my URL is.

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I had to get a sleep study done the other day, and the results finally came in.

Apparently I exhibit signs of narcolepsy????

I

am narcoleptic?????

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